Although I am relatively happy with the story that is being told, there are a few initial problems I have with my own script which I feel need addressing. I outlined these in the email I sent that this script was attached to. Some things I feel I need to work on in the 2nd draft of this script is;
- Improving the general layout and format of the script.
- Develop more of a sense of urgency in later scenes (where cracks begin to show in Douglas and Delaney's relationship, and people begin to get ill.)
- Develop Abigail more as a character, either through the adding of more dialogue, or having her show more emotion and react to the situations occurring around her more.
- Try and reduce the amount of flip-flopping from location to location and back again.
- Alter characters dialogue to sound more natural and less expositional.
My main focus with the next script draft will be to make the characters more relatable. One problem I have at the moment is making the characters react to certain news and situations in a realistic, believable way. For example, why doesn't Douglas simply agree to take Abigail back to the OmegaPharm laboratory to be tested on more, and possibly save herself and everyone around her.
These questions I hope I will be able to answer and improve in the next version of this script.
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